gut-wrenching

nothing sucks more than hearing your parents or grandparents cry. for me, that is. i'm sure kids trump both. but i digress.

sometimes i wish i was as tough as the facade i can pull off. i've spent most of the past hour silently crying after talking to my grandma. today would have been my grandfather's 89th birthday. it still physically hurts to think about it.

trying to concentrate on the good of today. today is also my cousin's 30th birthday, and she is awesome. something good with the bad makes everything okay. even steven, as seinfeld would say.