there is not enough alcohol in the world to erase the drama of the day's events. sometimes i wish i had a job to which i just had to show up, punch a clock, and not think. it's too bad that those jobs don't pay well enough to keep me content.
f.
10.30.2006
business venture?
Pink plastic flamingo faces extinction
By MARK JEWELL, AP Business WriterSun Oct 29, 1:23 PM ET
The day Mayor Dean Mazzarella turned 40, he got a surprise. "After I woke up and went out for my morning run, I came back and there were 40 pink flamingos in my front lawn," Mazzarella recalled. "Someone had put them there as a joke."
Now that he's 49 — "the same age as the pink flamingo," he notes — he hopes both he and the iconic lawn ornament that his city claims as its own will still be around next year to celebrate 50.
But the original version of the plastic flamingo may be singing its swan song after inspiring countless pranks — and being alternately celebrated as a tribute to one of nature's most graceful creatures and derided as the epitome of American pop culture kitsch.
Union Products Inc. stopped producing flamingos and other lawn ornaments at its Leominster factory in June, and is going out of business Nov. 1 — a victim of rising expenses for plastic resin and electricity, as well financing problems.
The small privately held firm has been in talks with a pair of rival lawn ornament makers interested in buying the molds and resuming production of the flamingos, designed in 1957 by local son Don Featherstone.
"We think the flamingo will go on," Keith Marshall, Union Products' chief financial officer, said at the company's aging brick factory, where just a few years ago more than 100 employees churned out flamingos by the millions.
Just a couple workers were still around to wrap up business. At the front desk stood a lone flamingo with the words "Happy 50th birthday" written with a black marker on the side, symbolizing hope that the flamingo will rise phoenix-like from the ashes to be reborn.
Other companies' knockoff versions of the Featherstone original remain in production. But the uncertainty surrounding the original has aficionados of kitsch snapping up what they can via the online auction site eBay and elsewhere in case Featherstone versions go out of stock for good.
Mike Smollon, a firefighter who sees plenty of plastic flamingos in his Boynton Beach, Fla., neighborhood, traveled to Leominster to attend a wedding last month and was surprised to learn the city about 50 miles northwest of Boston is home of the original flamingo.
"I guess it never dawned on me that pink flamingos would be made anywhere else than Florida," the 55-year-old said.
Smollon had never owned flamingos before. But, on learning of Union Products' demise, he was inspired to drop by the factory and buy a dozen pairs — $15 per pair for regular pink ones, and $25 for gold-colored special issue flamingos commemorating the bird's upcoming 50th birthday.
"This could be the end of them, and I wanted to get some," he said.
Smollon shipped the flock home and gave most of the birds to friends. He kept the most valuable ones for himself — those he had autographed by Featherstone during a visit to the retiree's home in Fitchburg, just down the road from Leominster.
Featherstone, who wrote a 1999 book about his creation called "Pink Flamingos: Splendor on the Grass," studied art before Union Products hired him in 1956 to expand a line of lawn ornaments that consisted of two-dimensional renderings of animals. Featherstone sculpted his 3-D flamingos from clay, working from photos of the birds in National Geographic.
The birds typically sell at around $10 for boxed sets of two — one standing nearly 3 feet high with its head held proudly erect, the other bending over as if munching on grass. Their legs consist of spindly metal rods that can be planted in the ground. The Featherstone originals have their creator's signature etched into the bird's plastic rear end.
The ornaments hit the market in the late 1950s when the color pink was in vogue, and America's exploding population of suburbanites sought to add flair to their lawns, said Kevin McCarthy, a retired University of Florida professor and author of several books on Florida's history and culture.
Meanwhile, the state's population was booming, and its tropical mystique rubbed off on the rest of America.
"The flamingo is an icon of Florida, and harkens back to a past when there were wild flamingos in large numbers in south Florida," McCarthy said.
But the birds also came to symbolize bad taste. They became the namesake of the 1972 John Waters film "Pink Flamingos," an epic to excess that celebrated a wide range of perversions. Some residential developments even banned flamingo ornaments from lawns.
The bird also became a target of pranksters, some of whom swiped the ornaments from front yards, took them on the road, and then sent photos to their owners showing the kidnapped birds in front of sights like Paris' Eiffel Tower.
The pink flamingo enjoyed a resurgence in the 1980s with the popularity of the television police show "Miami Vice," whose opening credits featured images of real birds. Today, the flamingo image is found on everything from doormats to swizzle sticks to roadside motel signs.
Featherstone originals remain a top seller in the gift shop at the National Plastics Center, a museum in Leominster that tells the story of the plastics industry both locally and internationally, including the pink flamingo.
"What started out as a fun fad turned into the ultimate in tacky, and evolved into kitsch art on your front lawn," said Marjorie Weiner, the museum's outreach coordinator. "You really can't help but smile when you look at them, and giggle, because they're funny."
Whatever the Featherstone flamingo's fate, Leominster's mayor plans to hold a party celebrating the creation's 50th birthday next June on the Town Common, which he hopes to fill with flamingos. Mazzarella said his city of 46,000 has purchased the rights to the Internet domain name http://www.flamingocity.net in hopes of capitalizing on its legacy.
"I don't think the pink flamingo is dead at all," said the mayor of the city. "But whatever happens, he was born here — that can't be taken away from us."
By MARK JEWELL, AP Business WriterSun Oct 29, 1:23 PM ET
The day Mayor Dean Mazzarella turned 40, he got a surprise. "After I woke up and went out for my morning run, I came back and there were 40 pink flamingos in my front lawn," Mazzarella recalled. "Someone had put them there as a joke."
Now that he's 49 — "the same age as the pink flamingo," he notes — he hopes both he and the iconic lawn ornament that his city claims as its own will still be around next year to celebrate 50.
But the original version of the plastic flamingo may be singing its swan song after inspiring countless pranks — and being alternately celebrated as a tribute to one of nature's most graceful creatures and derided as the epitome of American pop culture kitsch.
Union Products Inc. stopped producing flamingos and other lawn ornaments at its Leominster factory in June, and is going out of business Nov. 1 — a victim of rising expenses for plastic resin and electricity, as well financing problems.
The small privately held firm has been in talks with a pair of rival lawn ornament makers interested in buying the molds and resuming production of the flamingos, designed in 1957 by local son Don Featherstone.
"We think the flamingo will go on," Keith Marshall, Union Products' chief financial officer, said at the company's aging brick factory, where just a few years ago more than 100 employees churned out flamingos by the millions.
Just a couple workers were still around to wrap up business. At the front desk stood a lone flamingo with the words "Happy 50th birthday" written with a black marker on the side, symbolizing hope that the flamingo will rise phoenix-like from the ashes to be reborn.
Other companies' knockoff versions of the Featherstone original remain in production. But the uncertainty surrounding the original has aficionados of kitsch snapping up what they can via the online auction site eBay and elsewhere in case Featherstone versions go out of stock for good.
Mike Smollon, a firefighter who sees plenty of plastic flamingos in his Boynton Beach, Fla., neighborhood, traveled to Leominster to attend a wedding last month and was surprised to learn the city about 50 miles northwest of Boston is home of the original flamingo.
"I guess it never dawned on me that pink flamingos would be made anywhere else than Florida," the 55-year-old said.
Smollon had never owned flamingos before. But, on learning of Union Products' demise, he was inspired to drop by the factory and buy a dozen pairs — $15 per pair for regular pink ones, and $25 for gold-colored special issue flamingos commemorating the bird's upcoming 50th birthday.
"This could be the end of them, and I wanted to get some," he said.
Smollon shipped the flock home and gave most of the birds to friends. He kept the most valuable ones for himself — those he had autographed by Featherstone during a visit to the retiree's home in Fitchburg, just down the road from Leominster.
Featherstone, who wrote a 1999 book about his creation called "Pink Flamingos: Splendor on the Grass," studied art before Union Products hired him in 1956 to expand a line of lawn ornaments that consisted of two-dimensional renderings of animals. Featherstone sculpted his 3-D flamingos from clay, working from photos of the birds in National Geographic.
The birds typically sell at around $10 for boxed sets of two — one standing nearly 3 feet high with its head held proudly erect, the other bending over as if munching on grass. Their legs consist of spindly metal rods that can be planted in the ground. The Featherstone originals have their creator's signature etched into the bird's plastic rear end.
The ornaments hit the market in the late 1950s when the color pink was in vogue, and America's exploding population of suburbanites sought to add flair to their lawns, said Kevin McCarthy, a retired University of Florida professor and author of several books on Florida's history and culture.
Meanwhile, the state's population was booming, and its tropical mystique rubbed off on the rest of America.
"The flamingo is an icon of Florida, and harkens back to a past when there were wild flamingos in large numbers in south Florida," McCarthy said.
But the birds also came to symbolize bad taste. They became the namesake of the 1972 John Waters film "Pink Flamingos," an epic to excess that celebrated a wide range of perversions. Some residential developments even banned flamingo ornaments from lawns.
The bird also became a target of pranksters, some of whom swiped the ornaments from front yards, took them on the road, and then sent photos to their owners showing the kidnapped birds in front of sights like Paris' Eiffel Tower.
The pink flamingo enjoyed a resurgence in the 1980s with the popularity of the television police show "Miami Vice," whose opening credits featured images of real birds. Today, the flamingo image is found on everything from doormats to swizzle sticks to roadside motel signs.
Featherstone originals remain a top seller in the gift shop at the National Plastics Center, a museum in Leominster that tells the story of the plastics industry both locally and internationally, including the pink flamingo.
"What started out as a fun fad turned into the ultimate in tacky, and evolved into kitsch art on your front lawn," said Marjorie Weiner, the museum's outreach coordinator. "You really can't help but smile when you look at them, and giggle, because they're funny."
Whatever the Featherstone flamingo's fate, Leominster's mayor plans to hold a party celebrating the creation's 50th birthday next June on the Town Common, which he hopes to fill with flamingos. Mazzarella said his city of 46,000 has purchased the rights to the Internet domain name http://www.flamingocity.net in hopes of capitalizing on its legacy.
"I don't think the pink flamingo is dead at all," said the mayor of the city. "But whatever happens, he was born here — that can't be taken away from us."
wow
my pal kristine and i did a little walking this morning. when we parted, she asked me if i had a couple of bucks on me. i offered what i had, a twenty-dollar bill. she said, "that's okay...i only need a couple of bucks." i offered up what change i had ... including the $1.30 her daughter left in my car last week. (sid gave me the money because she has lots of monies and she wanted to share!) i think kristine made off with $2.30 in change.
i figured she was stopping to get a cup of coffee ... so imagine my surprise when she said she was going to the gas station! she bought $2.30 worth of gas ... paying in coins! wow. and i thought i'd seen it all.
i figured she was stopping to get a cup of coffee ... so imagine my surprise when she said she was going to the gas station! she bought $2.30 worth of gas ... paying in coins! wow. and i thought i'd seen it all.
10.29.2006
anniversary
joe and i celebrated three fabulous years of marriage by having a day at the spa. we had massages, manicures and pedicures. it was lovely. :-) we also had a delicious dinner at which we consumed a decadent slice of cheesecake. cheesecake is definitely not on the ww plan, but we did share it!
the fun ended this morning. when i smashed my toe in my office ... the accident has left me with a bloody stump of a toenail! not to mention that the incident completely ruined my pedicure!
but i digress. here's to more years of wedded bliss!
10.27.2006
driver's license
f. i mis-placed my driver's license. at least i have a spare! :-) but this means another trip to the DMV. i loathe that place.
10.26.2006
general malfeasance
who is this woman?
who is the kid in the backseat?
why is she staked out across the street? for over an hour?
this isn't a trailer park, babe!
i may never eat barbeque again
the company i work for used to make an item called "cotton dish mop." it was a handheld brush, if you will, with cotton fibers. (see picture). as indicated by the name, it was to be used as a dish washing implement. that is all.
this item was recently disco'd from the line. since it was disco'd, there have been some requests for it to be brought back. nothing unusual yet.
here's where it gets disgusting. said customers are using it to slap / smother / apply barbeque sauce to meat! this is vile for many reasons, including:
a. little cotton fibers wind up in the sauce
b. the sauce would stain the cotton fibers; how would one clean said implement?
my rep then told me that he's been to barbeque places that use a full-sized cotton deck mop to apply alot of sauce to alot of meat.
i may barf. haven't these people heard of silicone barbeque brushes? no fuzzies and easy to clean!
10.25.2006
otherwise known as sheila the great
did anyone else read otherwise known as sheila the great by judy blume when we were growing up?
well, sheila is apparently my new nickname. my new hair stylist, kathleen, referred to me as "sheila" during kristine's entire haircut and color. even when she remindered her that my name is julie ... is julie really that hard to remember?
10.24.2006
teddy bear's picnic?
who would leave a teddy bear in a bathroom stall? s/he was sitting on the toilet paper cover dispenser; too high for s/he to have been left by a child.
as seen in stall #2 - cheesecake factory - brea, ca - october 16, 2006 (i just cleaned out the pictures on my phone - which is why the picture kinda sucks - no flash!)
10.22.2006
boardwalk farter
kristine and i hit the boardwalk / beach this morning for a little exercise.
all was well until we were on our way back to the car ... we were in front of the crowne plaza (used to be the holiday inn), for those of you who have been to ventura, and we passed this couple who were gazing out at the ocean.
the guy totally farted as we walked by. it was the loudest fart i've heard in a very long time. i looked back and he wouldn't make eye contact ... the woman with him was HORRIFIED.
disgusting oinker.
all was well until we were on our way back to the car ... we were in front of the crowne plaza (used to be the holiday inn), for those of you who have been to ventura, and we passed this couple who were gazing out at the ocean.
the guy totally farted as we walked by. it was the loudest fart i've heard in a very long time. i looked back and he wouldn't make eye contact ... the woman with him was HORRIFIED.
disgusting oinker.
10.20.2006
the ups store
the one in ventura sucks.
they're a UPS store, but they don't stock any UPS shipping supplies, they don't have a late pick-up (the box down the road gets visited by a driver AFTER the store), and you have to pay $10 extra for a saturday pick-up.
i loathe them.
however, i am stuck between a rock and a hard place. if i use fed ex for work, the dollars come out of my regional budget; if i don't, they come out of the corporate budget.
so, i will keep hating them and find another place at which to drop my UPS packages ... as i can assure you i will not set foot in the ventura store again.
they're a UPS store, but they don't stock any UPS shipping supplies, they don't have a late pick-up (the box down the road gets visited by a driver AFTER the store), and you have to pay $10 extra for a saturday pick-up.
i loathe them.
however, i am stuck between a rock and a hard place. if i use fed ex for work, the dollars come out of my regional budget; if i don't, they come out of the corporate budget.
so, i will keep hating them and find another place at which to drop my UPS packages ... as i can assure you i will not set foot in the ventura store again.
quote for the day
"A woman is like a tea bag. You never know how strong she is until she gets into hot water."
-Eleanor Roosevelt
-Eleanor Roosevelt
10.19.2006
hot
it was 90 degrees in camarillo today and almost 80 degrees in ventura.
isn't it the middle of october? where's our fall weather? i'm super tired of shorts. :-(
maybe it'll snow in chicago during my early november trip ... that would be great fun!
isn't it the middle of october? where's our fall weather? i'm super tired of shorts. :-(
maybe it'll snow in chicago during my early november trip ... that would be great fun!
starbucks groupies
i'm in a starbucks right now ... killing time before my doctor's appointment. i heart starbucks because they have wireless and i can work and drink coffee.
i do this about 2 x a month. tops.
however, i'm pretty sure that some of the people in this starbucks are here daily ... not just to get coffee (which is totally normal), but to hang out and socialize with the staff.
case in point. there is a 40 something year old woman ... she's not clean and definitely not put together ... she's totally hyper and keeps jumping up to say something clever to the 20-something co-ed staff. it's kinda sad.
i do this about 2 x a month. tops.
however, i'm pretty sure that some of the people in this starbucks are here daily ... not just to get coffee (which is totally normal), but to hang out and socialize with the staff.
case in point. there is a 40 something year old woman ... she's not clean and definitely not put together ... she's totally hyper and keeps jumping up to say something clever to the 20-something co-ed staff. it's kinda sad.
10.18.2006
10.17.2006
postcard from malibu tim!
interesting observation from malibu tim re: his recent trip to hong kong ...
HK may refer to "Hello Kitty" rather than "Hong Kong." apparently the country is filled with wall-to-wall Hello Kitty accoutrements!
i think that is fabulous!
HK may refer to "Hello Kitty" rather than "Hong Kong." apparently the country is filled with wall-to-wall Hello Kitty accoutrements!
i think that is fabulous!
bushwhacked
as seen on www.cafepress.com
w = nixon 2.0
[re: w] more corrupt than nixon and not nearly as smart
we've been lied to since birth
just how bad do you have to be to make nixon look good?
10.15.2006
unexpected domesticity
i have an adorable sweater that has several crystal-like buttons.
one of them broke while i was in philadelphia. i remembered that it came with a spare and figured i'd take it to the cleaners when i got home for repair.
then i thought ... a button? i think i can handle it.
so, i tried ... and succeeded! the button sewing went so well that i re-did all of the buttons on the sweater because they were getting a little loose.
it's perfect now ... and i did it myself! woohoo!
one of them broke while i was in philadelphia. i remembered that it came with a spare and figured i'd take it to the cleaners when i got home for repair.
then i thought ... a button? i think i can handle it.
so, i tried ... and succeeded! the button sewing went so well that i re-did all of the buttons on the sweater because they were getting a little loose.
it's perfect now ... and i did it myself! woohoo!
10.14.2006
is lola part skunk?
so i'm pretty sure that lola is part skunk.
when she's upset ... and her fur rises on her hind end and neck ... and especially when she barks ... she also farts.
it's so not a coincidence.
when she's upset ... and her fur rises on her hind end and neck ... and especially when she barks ... she also farts.
it's so not a coincidence.
10.13.2006
10.12.2006
whew. no worries.
so i just got an email from the human resources director regarding the company auto insurance policy. apparently, she just realized that my driver's license expired almost 6 months ago and could i please send a copy of the renewed license ASAP as i haven't been covered for the past 6 months.
so ... i doubt she'd get around to dealing with alleged malfeasance during a sales dinner.
so ... i doubt she'd get around to dealing with alleged malfeasance during a sales dinner.
human resources nightmare
so just how inappropriate is it for a senior vice president of sales, a regional vice president of sales, a sales manager, and four account managers to play "who'd you do?" and "ABC" at dinner?
"who'd you do" is played by one person naming two people at the office and the rest of the group, in turn, choosing who'd they'd do out of the pair. not pretty, i tell you!
"ABC" is where everyone names their "A," "B," and "C" sex partners - usually celebrities. "A" = the person with whom you'd just have booty calls, "B" = someone you'd totally marry, and "C" is the person you want to shag, but would keep it secret.
wow.
"who'd you do" is played by one person naming two people at the office and the rest of the group, in turn, choosing who'd they'd do out of the pair. not pretty, i tell you!
"ABC" is where everyone names their "A," "B," and "C" sex partners - usually celebrities. "A" = the person with whom you'd just have booty calls, "B" = someone you'd totally marry, and "C" is the person you want to shag, but would keep it secret.
wow.
10.11.2006
WAL*MART update
i survived.
however, i do have this observation.
given the demographic of the typical wal*mart shopper, self-checkout registers are not a good idea. the pressure is simply too great.
however, i do have this observation.
given the demographic of the typical wal*mart shopper, self-checkout registers are not a good idea. the pressure is simply too great.
10.10.2006
recent celebrity sightings ...
william jefferson clinton - philadelphia, pa on 10/05/06
jeremy "you must give me my firebird keys" piven - american flight from ORD to LAX on 10/09/06
i really want to be famous. :-)
jeremy "you must give me my firebird keys" piven - american flight from ORD to LAX on 10/09/06
i really want to be famous. :-)
10.08.2006
pink
in honor of breast cancer awareness month, the city of philadelphia has dyed the famous love fountain pink. it is the most beautiful thing in the city! enjoy!
10.07.2006
10.06.2006
ps.
how am i going to get up at 6:30 am EST on a fucking saturday morning after drinking so many martinis? i'm scared.
crazy + 7 apple martinis
holy crap ... it's been a crazy week.
i will debrief as i remember ... i've been indulging in libations every night since i landed in philly.
tonight was no exception. was at a VERY POSH restaurant tonight ... $50 entrees ... had 7 martinis and wrote on a comment card ....
"would like access to souvenir glasses and t-shirts. possibly panties."
we're talking zagat fucking rated and this is the best that my colleagues and i could come up with. bloody brilliant, i tell you.
it's been a wild ride. two more days to go.
jsw - a princess without a country.
ps. thanks to sweet who sent me a text message picture of her mom riding her daughter's train. i almost peed my pants during my "fancy" dinner. gotta love that!
i will debrief as i remember ... i've been indulging in libations every night since i landed in philly.
tonight was no exception. was at a VERY POSH restaurant tonight ... $50 entrees ... had 7 martinis and wrote on a comment card ....
"would like access to souvenir glasses and t-shirts. possibly panties."
we're talking zagat fucking rated and this is the best that my colleagues and i could come up with. bloody brilliant, i tell you.
it's been a wild ride. two more days to go.
jsw - a princess without a country.
ps. thanks to sweet who sent me a text message picture of her mom riding her daughter's train. i almost peed my pants during my "fancy" dinner. gotta love that!
10.03.2006
you give some people a badge ...
unbefuckinglievable is the only way to describe memphis airport security and their tsa agents.
so, i've traveled almost every week since the liquid ban and have had NO problems. i've read everything my airline of choice sends me regarding carry-on luggage updates ... and i adhere to the ever-changing guidelines.
apparently, the memphis tsa were on loan from heathrow.
this mean tsa agent roamed up and down the SLOWER THAN MOLASSES line yelling at us about liquids. i didn't really listen because i thought i had it all under control.
she then proceeded to advise that ALL "LEGAL" liquids had to be in a quart sized ziploc-type baggie to pass through security. otherwise it had to be checked.
again ... not heathrow ... USA.
so, i figured, what the hell, jail in memphis might be a good time, so i started in with the questions.
"why are you requiring the baggie? these are domestic flights. liquids under 4 oz. per container are allowed, regardless of receptacle."
to which she replied, "that's just the way it is."
so i gave her my slits and proceeded to dig through my carry-ons ... looking for a spare hello kitty baggie. it may not be quart-sized, but i figured it'd work.
i then remembered that my medications are in a clear plastic pouch ... and even though the zipper is printed with flamingos, it's 99% transparent.
i proceeded to transfer my lip gloss, eye drops, purell and tide to go to the medicine pouch. bitch-face noticed my activities and swarmed right over ... demanding to see what i was doing.
that's really out of line, babe ... i'm OUTSIDE of the sterile area. you can't touch me. :-) i glared and she reached out and tried to GRAB my belongings. to which i asked, "do you need to actually handle my items outside of the search area?"
i figured i was going to jail for sure.
she then asked about the medications ... did i have proper documentation? i offered to pull each and every rx copy for her inspection ... deciding that i was going to kill her with kindness. she declined and handed my property back.
FINALLY, i made it to the front of the line.
i stripped down, put my stuff in bins and walked through.
not one tsa agent even looked at my medication / beauty bag. bitch.
so, i'm on the other side, patience is at a premium, and i'm putting myself back together. my honeymoon necklace was in the same bin as my shoes. it's a very expensive piece of jewelry ... and i'm very careful with it. so, i'm watching the necklace in the bin as i'm tossing my shoes on the ground. without any notice, some old, bald tsa guy grabs the bin, and starts to tilt it in an effort to put it away. my necklace was precariously hanging on for dear life! i lost it. i yelled, "STOP IT...WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?" then, in a calmer voice, i advised him that the necklace is not replaceable and that he was not to touch my property again now that it had been cleared by x-ray boy."
i walked away before the cuffs could be produced.
i loathe memphis. there was no burnin' love here today.
so, i've traveled almost every week since the liquid ban and have had NO problems. i've read everything my airline of choice sends me regarding carry-on luggage updates ... and i adhere to the ever-changing guidelines.
apparently, the memphis tsa were on loan from heathrow.
this mean tsa agent roamed up and down the SLOWER THAN MOLASSES line yelling at us about liquids. i didn't really listen because i thought i had it all under control.
she then proceeded to advise that ALL "LEGAL" liquids had to be in a quart sized ziploc-type baggie to pass through security. otherwise it had to be checked.
again ... not heathrow ... USA.
so, i figured, what the hell, jail in memphis might be a good time, so i started in with the questions.
"why are you requiring the baggie? these are domestic flights. liquids under 4 oz. per container are allowed, regardless of receptacle."
to which she replied, "that's just the way it is."
so i gave her my slits and proceeded to dig through my carry-ons ... looking for a spare hello kitty baggie. it may not be quart-sized, but i figured it'd work.
i then remembered that my medications are in a clear plastic pouch ... and even though the zipper is printed with flamingos, it's 99% transparent.
i proceeded to transfer my lip gloss, eye drops, purell and tide to go to the medicine pouch. bitch-face noticed my activities and swarmed right over ... demanding to see what i was doing.
that's really out of line, babe ... i'm OUTSIDE of the sterile area. you can't touch me. :-) i glared and she reached out and tried to GRAB my belongings. to which i asked, "do you need to actually handle my items outside of the search area?"
i figured i was going to jail for sure.
she then asked about the medications ... did i have proper documentation? i offered to pull each and every rx copy for her inspection ... deciding that i was going to kill her with kindness. she declined and handed my property back.
FINALLY, i made it to the front of the line.
i stripped down, put my stuff in bins and walked through.
not one tsa agent even looked at my medication / beauty bag. bitch.
so, i'm on the other side, patience is at a premium, and i'm putting myself back together. my honeymoon necklace was in the same bin as my shoes. it's a very expensive piece of jewelry ... and i'm very careful with it. so, i'm watching the necklace in the bin as i'm tossing my shoes on the ground. without any notice, some old, bald tsa guy grabs the bin, and starts to tilt it in an effort to put it away. my necklace was precariously hanging on for dear life! i lost it. i yelled, "STOP IT...WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?" then, in a calmer voice, i advised him that the necklace is not replaceable and that he was not to touch my property again now that it had been cleared by x-ray boy."
i walked away before the cuffs could be produced.
i loathe memphis. there was no burnin' love here today.
10.02.2006
hand soap
i just washed my hands in the dallas airport.
it took me about 10 minutes to figure out that the "old man smell" was coming from my freshly washed hands!
why on earth would someone scent soap to smell like an old guy? is unscented soap just too much to ask for?
it took me about 10 minutes to figure out that the "old man smell" was coming from my freshly washed hands!
why on earth would someone scent soap to smell like an old guy? is unscented soap just too much to ask for?
f. the mini blueberry muffin
mini muffins were made available in the airport lounge this morning. as i only had a yogurt for breakfast this morning, i figured, how bad could a couple of mini blueberry muffins be? they're so little and cute ...
oh how wrong i was! turns out i blew 4 points - about 200 calories - on the little beasts. who knew? they were good, but not that good!
i cringe to think how many calories are in the big blueberry muffins, much less a chocolate chip muffin! F. no more muffins for FG!
oh how wrong i was! turns out i blew 4 points - about 200 calories - on the little beasts. who knew? they were good, but not that good!
i cringe to think how many calories are in the big blueberry muffins, much less a chocolate chip muffin! F. no more muffins for FG!
10.01.2006
sunday night dinner
in honor of my eight day business trip that commences tomorrow, i made a real sunday dinner tonight. it actually started this morning ... i put a roast, carrots, potatoes and onions in the crock pot and turned it on. i even remembered to "sear" the meat before i tossed it in. (okay, i really couldn't remember what i was supposed to do to prep the meat, so i did pound it with a meat doodle first, but quickly remembered that you do that to chicken, not cow.) i really thought joe might cry when he saw that i made dinner.
all was well until we were about 1/2 way through the meal and i smelled something burning. let's just say that the bread i prepared was no longer edible.
all in all, not bad for a julie-cooked meal. :-)
all was well until we were about 1/2 way through the meal and i smelled something burning. let's just say that the bread i prepared was no longer edible.
all in all, not bad for a julie-cooked meal. :-)
i don't do dishes
"i don't do dishes" is the name of the new nail polish i picked up last week ... (it's by OPI). it's my new mantra ... my feet feel different with this stellar polish applied to my toenails. :-)
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