i do not speak pie

i was so pysched to try my hand at another pecan pie this year ... it's been at least 5 years since the last disaster, so i figured i was in good shape.

WRONG. WELL, MAYBE WRONG.

i followed the instructions to a T. and it still came out ... well, really there is just a potential that it's over-cooked (last time it was under - so progress, right?) ... joe wants me to cut it here so i can avoid public humiliation tomorrow. but i say, bring it on. we can't all be little suzie fucking homemakers, can we? i am successful at my job, super fun, hilarious, fabulous (i could go on all day) ... so should i really care that i fucked up another pie? potentially fucked up, but still. it's not like i know for sure that it's good.

i'm making chocolate chip cookies as a back-up. i can so make those.

next year i am signing up for martinis. i speak martini. i think it's time to admit that i do not speak pie.